I haven't had sex in a very long time and that's counting the encounter I mentioned in my last post. The last time we kissed was a even longer time ago. I'm deprived.
Being a very sexual person this is hard for me. I don't like the idea of cheating and lying especially since we have a child together. I want this to end as smoothly as possible but it's going to maybe be another two months before that happens. I don't know if I can wait.
When I go out for drinks with friends, men always hit on me. I must admit I a get a lot of attention. But I'm not tempted. Meeting men at bars isn't for me. When drinking is involved, who knows who these men really are. For example, I'm drinking, sometimes more than I should so I'm very outgoing and charismatic, I'm not like that all the time.
There is someone I can't put out of my mind. I meet him at a bar but for a networking event so it doesn't really count. We've done business together but that's it. He likes me but knows I'm with someone. He doesn't know that it's a bad situation and I don't think he knows that we live together. He's a really nice, good guy so I don't think he would go for it with just the knowledge that I have someone in my life. I wish I was single so I can see if it's worth anything. One thing especially great about him is the way he looks at me. My sons father never looked at me that way.
I happened to see this person last night and he touched the top of my foot. It turned me on. I left quickly and will try to keep my distance. Maybe I will look him up in two months after it's over. If it's truly something there, I don't want to mess it up with a ugly beginning.
Two months seem like forever.